Well, all right, okay, the Holidays are coming up?
Well all right, okay, what do you do?
When you all get together?
Who’s the first to put their foot in their mouths?
Yup, yup, yup, we’ve all been there. Holiday get- togethers. That precious time when everyone is corralled, I mean invited over to spend some quality time together.
Yeah, we get it. But, but, but!
Sounds like a sputtering engine, doesn’t it? Holiday get-togethers are a dangerous holiday tradition that kills relationships, dampen spirits, and otherwise spoil what’s suppose to be one of America’s richest traditions – outside of Christmas that is.
Yeah, I said the dreaded C-word. Hey I’m from the 50’s. Cut me some slack.
What do you do to prevent relative fall-out. First things first as my doctor tells me on losing weight.
- Face your temptation. Deal with it, then Get over it. Loosely translated, before you open your mouth and say something that both of you will regret, swallow it, rush to the bathroom, look in your wallet or purse, or just head out of the room. That particular comment, advice, hint, philosophy wasn’t shared at the original faux-pas, why bring it up now? Or as Mamma use to say “If you don’t have something nice to say, keep your lips compressed and swallow it with some water, wine, or beer.
- Children and teens have these giant extensions on the side of their heads. Adults call them ears. Grandma here calls them antennas. And these antennas pick up on the strangest and strongest vibrations. Therefore you shalt not a) curse, keep dam, hell, shit, and fuck out of your vocabulary and if luck is a lady in your household, your teen and child won’t say them either. b) keep to the subject – don’t invite trouble. Don’t dredge up the past, unless you’re going to make everyone shine. You don’t want you child to make comparisons between what you did and what they will do eventually. It will make you look like a wimp. c) Espouse good will toward men and your children, teen, will do the same thing. Kids are great imitators of the lives around them. If they’re going to take on your mannerisms, speech, attitudes, and prejudices, make sure they’re not full of hatred, scorn, dislike, or put-downs. Your off-spring will try all these goodies out – on their friends, their relatives, and your grown-up friends.
- Don’t preach to the choir. I’m sure by now, even a toddler knows, everything about how they should behave in private versus behaving in public. Two different things really. If you don’t believe me. Watch how they behave at home and then take those same kids to the mall. Uh huh, they’re not the same kids. Yeah, they act differently with other people like aunts and uncles compared to babysitters and nannies. It’s all in there. Just watch and observe. You want to make sure that whatever behavior your child enacts that it’s consistent all the time.
- The most important. Don’t, I repeat, Don’t compare one child against the other or compare your child against what you did when you were that age. Despite what people think, children and teens and adults mature at different ages at different levels. Take my mother, for example. When she was 12, she already smoked, drank, and had S— with the opposite sex. Funny that same word is applied differently here. Make sure you look at your child at that age as your child. When I was 12, I biked all weekend, didn’t come home until the cows came home, and generally didn’t know what to do with a boy, eck!
So, there you have it. Keep your mouth close. Say nice thing. Yes, by all means, stay away from the 2016 presidential campaign, stay away from immigration, the Mexicans, the Syrians, the Cubans, whoever is storming America’s shores at this time.
- Keep the conversation civil and perhaps, maybe, your Holiday get-togethers won’t result in armed conflict, pie throwing contest, or relatives storming out of the door and vowing never to darken your doors again.
Of course, if everyone loves football, you’re saved.
If everyone brings their tablet or cell phone and watches HBO on them, you’re saved.
If everyone eats too much turkey and in the bathroom, you’re saved.
So think about how to have a Happy and Delightful dinner with your friends, Romans, and relatives, and everyone will lend you their ears, hearts, and stomachs for a joyous feast just served hot out of the stove!
HAPPY TURKEY DAY EVERYONE AND TO EVERYONE A GOOD NIGHT!